Watt a Nerd Magazine

The holiday season is upon us, and Thanksgiving has come. So, what does a nerd have to be thankful for this year?

If you're a book nerd, there's quite a wonderful movie adaptation of a certain popular dystopian novel that came out on November 22nd. Was Catching Fire any good? I have it on good authority from a friend (and Internet sources seem to agree) that, yes, it was indeed good. Better, in fact, than The Hunger Games was. I was a huge fan of the Hunger Games movie, but there were certainly things wrong with it, so getting things even better about one of the best YA series out there is a good thing that I can't wait to see.

If you're a DisNerd, then you were probably all up and excited for Frozen coming out on November 27th. Was that any good? I've been following it since the first news broke, and despite not having seen it yet, I've got a love-hate relationship with the whole thing (faithless adaptation, historic whitewashing, and talking snowmen, oh my!). But my prediction is that, yes, if you just cover your ears every time the comic-relief snowman comes onto the screen, it will be a fantastic movie.

But what if you're any other kind of nerd? Then there was one thing you were definitely thankful for. One kinda sorta BIG thing. One thing that, if you weren't at least slightly excited, meant that you couldn't legitimately call yourself a nerd...

A SPACEY WACEY TIMEY WIMEY DAVID TENNANT YOU ARE SUCH A BEAUTIFUL PERSON thing.

(I will now pause to give you all a chance to either fangirl over having seen the Doctor Who 50th anniversary special, bemoan the fact that you haven't seen it yet, or make your escape quietly before the rabid Whovians realize you don't care.)

That's right, we are now living in a time and space that has been dramatically altered from its pre-November-24th condition by the existence of a Doctor Who episode containing appearances from all thirteen (!) of the Doctor's regenerations all at once. I wasn't one of the lucky ones who got to go see it in a theater—no, my family tricked our American computer into thinking it was in Britain and streamed the episode illegally, shh—but I certainly enjoyed the heck out of the day. And so now the question is, was the episode as good as it promised to be?

Well... yes? Ish? (There are going to be spoilers.)

I'll start with what I appreciated the most about this episode (even more than seeing David Tennant again). The timey-wimeyness. So much of the plot revolved around flashbacks and time portals and TARDIS travel and doubling back and being in two (or three) places at once and it was all really awesome. For a show about a time-traveling madman with a blue box, there sometimes isn't quite enough personal abuse of the technology to achieve plot-twist ends as there should be. (Like seriously Doctor it was impossible to rescue Amy and Rory yeah right.) But not in this episode. In Day of the Doctor, they took this and used it as much as they possibly could and it was beautiful and amazing and I just loved it all so much.

Okay, next thing. David Tennant. We need to talk about David Tennant so much. Everyone has their favorite Doctor, and for many that's Matt Smith, but I just can't make myself tolerate that guy much longer. He tries too hard. Not like David Tennant. David Tennant...

Another fangirl pause. (Dangit Edessa you swore you'd never do this over any guy.)

And no, maybe I shouldn't be fangirling so much over him, because truth be told there wasn't quite... enough of him in the anniversary special. And what was there just didn't feel genuine. It's probably all thanks to Stephen Moffat's style of scriptwriting, which I've never been a huge fan of, but several of the jokes he made (compensating for something, really?) and the role he played (okay how many wives have you had by this point?) fell flat. On the other hand. Thank you SO MUCH for criticising Matt Smith's sonic screwdriver and his TARDIS and evertything else and thank you for there now being a reason Queen Elizabeth hates you in that one Season Three episode and thank you for all around existing and for saying "allons-y" yet again.

And what about the third Doctor? By which, of course, I mean the War Doctor played by John Hurt. Well, you, sir, were amazing. I enjoyed this guy quite a lot. It was so much fun to see an older Doctor standing there raising his eyebrows at the shenanigans of the two younger guys. And he was so funny and yet so serious and I honestly believe he gave the best performance as the Doctor in that episode, and that's that.

And while we're still talking about Doctors, I may not have ever watched any episodes with the Fourth Doctor, but it was still awesome to see him there at the end. It didn't have to make sense. It was awesome.

I kinda wish Christopher Eccleston had been here, though.

And hello, creeeeeeepy Billie Piper. Seeing her again was awesome too, even if she wasn't playing Rose. Though it does make it seem as if the Doctor really has a thing for pretty women embodying the consciousnesses of seemingly inanimate boxes.

Now let's talk about that box. Since, y'know, so much of the plot and stuff was centered around it. The main conflict of this episode was the War Doctor having to decide whether or not to blow up Gallifrey and all the Daleks and Time Lords on it. Magical Billie Piper comes out of the weapon he'd use and sends him through a time portal to meet the Eleventh and Twelfth Doctors to see the men he'd become if he does it. Then all three of them plus Clara go back to that moment and make a Decision about it Together.

In the most looooooooooooonng draaaaaaaaaaaaaawwn oooooooooooout sceeeeeeeeeeeeeene eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeever. I hate it when Doctor Who episodes make me yawn, I really do.

The point was, it was an awful lot of buildup for a payoff that barely existed. It's like ten minutes straight of Will He or Won't He and we all know he Won't because he's the Doctor, but by the end of that whole entire "I'm showing you your home planet to inspire guilt even though I'm pretty sure you were there at the beginning of this episode" scene I was wishing he Would push the big red button.

Oh, no, I'm serious. It would genuinely have made the whole show better.

Why? Because then all this angst and dark deep thoughts they keep giving the Doctor would be justified, and because then it would continue to be justified for all future Doctors. Because then the Doctor would be a really deep, complex, tragic character instead of a guy who forgot that he didn't push a button. Nobody wants a one-dimensional character who’s a hero because heroes are the good guys and we all like good guys. Nope. People want a character with flaws. And blowing up Gallifrey would have been just about the best flaw they could give a too-good-to-be-true character like the Doctor.

So yeah. The Doctor needs to kill more babies. I said it.

Now that I’m an official disgrace to my fandom, I can go on to the final thing I didn’t like about Day of the Doctor.

It was a letdown. I said that already, right? But not just that plot buildup and its payoff, the whole overall episode was a letdown. Remember how much hype there was over this? Remember those super cool previews that showed every single Doctor ever all close up and in a space together? Well, that was what I was expecting to see. All the Doctors doing stuff. And yeah, that kind of happened—with no explanation at all as to how One through Eight knew they were supposed to fly their TARDISes to that spot—and there was that cool last shot, but I wanted more. Of course I didn’t expect all the Doctors to be there together doing stuff together, but I would have liked more mention of them at least. I. Wanted. More. And the fact that I didn’t get that... well, it wasn’t bad in and of itself, but it wasn’t what the previews promised.

Oh and a quick detour into feminism before the rabid Whovians tear me apart seriously why was there only one female Gallifreyan in the war council room like I thought they were this super awesome progressive race that’s totally fine with transgendered Time Lords but apparently girls still have too many cooties to plan manly things like war, what the fudge?

Now it is time to back away slowly from all the Whovians I have just angered. Before you eat my soul alive, guys, let me say again that yes, I did enjoy this special. Yes, I even loved this special. Yes, it will forever be one of my absolute favorite Doctor Who episodes ever. Because for all its flaws, well... come on. It’s Doctor Who. And flaws or no flaws, it is beautiful.

Happy Thanksgiving from EstrangeloEdessa, everyone, and I hope that this year you're all thankful that folks like me do the dirty work of criticizing so everyone else can run off and fangirl. Now I'm off to bake candied yams, and I'll see you again in my next Nerdy column, where hopefully I'll be ranting about something a lot less dangerous!